Tomorrow is my last official day of college. I am going to do something meaningful to celebrate this investment of years, but I haven’t figured out what yet. It seems strange to me the people over time who have come into my life and those who have faded out of it. So many memories. I have learned and grown so much here, albeit, I have a lot of growing up to do still. I will probably be able to say that when I am 105 years old and on my deathbed.
There is a walmart receipt on the desk beside me, and I am thinking about how materialistic our culture is and wondering how much it displeases God that we value things over people. Is He minorly annoyed, or is He burning with anger? Am I a good steward of what He has given me? I could do better. I guess I kind of have this idea in the back of my mind that if I am able to spend a lot of time helping people, then that will help to make up for how wasteful I am with everything else. I like helping people, and it is not some weird guilt complex that makes me want to see people taken care of. I love people. They are the coolest things that God created in my opinion. If I could spend my whole life on other people and just meet my own needs and nothing more, then I would die knowing that I had pleased my Creator with how I spent my life.
This teaching job, I would do it for free. Dr. A’s research holds much less appeal when I think about it. In a way, I feel like all I’m doing is making money and not really making a difference. I will have to figure out a way to change that.
Then I am thinking about fart humor. I honestly think that God created farts and burps to be funny. I haven’t laughed enough here lately. I realized that as I was rolling on the floor with asthma and tears streaming down my face yesterday when Kita and I were hanging out. I have just been too stressed and it has taken some of the life out of me. The cool part about that is after a stressful period of my life is over, I always come back with even more to offer than I had to start with. This stressful part of my life is about to let up, too. Exciting!
And then there is Millie. I love how she always wants stuff to be right with us. I love how she loves me basically no matter what. I really wouldn’t ever want to be with anyone else ever. I am excited about Christmas break, too. We had so much fun over the summer and it was an awesome time of growing closer. I am thrilled to think about spending the rest of my life with her. Kita told me last night that before I met Millie, I would have made the happiest single person ever. But now I don’t want to be single, I want to be with her. A person can live on pemmican for the rest of their life and be fine and healthy and happy, especially if they have never tasted anything else. But in Millie, I tasted something so much better that I would be fine and dandy to never eat pemmican again. It’s wonderful to be with her. I can hardly wait to see what God has got up His sleeve for us to do. I would say that it is safe to say that I am ready to move on to the next step of life, and it is just around the corner.
I love God. I love how He is so big and still sees me as significant. His love for me is something that I want others to know.